Monday, May 16, 2005

The Fit Tend to Fidget, and Biology May Be Why, a Study Says

I saved an article from the Jan 28 New York Times from which the following is excerpted:

The Fit Tend to Fidget, and Biology May Be Why, a Study Says

Overweight people have a tendency to sit, while lean ones have trouble holding still and spend two hours more a day on their feet, pacing around and fidgeting, researchers are reporting in findings published today.

The difference translates into about 350 calories a day, enough to produce a weight loss of 30 to 40 pounds in one year without trips to the gym - if only heavy people could act more restless, like thin ones.


The normally dependable psychiatric publicists at the Times surprisingly failed in this instance to note that fidgeting is a symptom of mental illness. This is a gross oversight that could have been avoided had their liberal bias not dissuaded them from reading The Heritage Foundation's "A Policymaker's Guide to Mental Illness."

Who in his right mind wouldn't rather be a heavy person than mentally ill? Not too heavy though, lest one waddle into another mental illness: obesity.

Psychiatric wonder drugs to the rescue! They induce good, synthetic fidgeting and pacing while vanquishing the mental illnesses that are associated with bad, natural fidgeting and pacing. Given the scientifically precise dosage, you can feel great about your improved physical and mental fitness as you stride around the facility. Who says you can't have your cake and eat it, too?


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